“It would have been easy for Donald to be a hero,” writes Mary Trump, President and Ultimate Member of the Book of the Month Club Donald Trump’s niece and seemingly one of the only people in the Trump clan capable of human emotion, self-reflection, and complex thought, in the epilogue of her recently published, much … Continue reading
*Bang!* *BOOM* *tsssssssss* OH MY GOD! WHAT IS THAT?!! IS THAT A BOMB?! OR A BOX OF BOOM SQUAD?! Why are those explosions so close to my rattling windows? Why do they look like they’re being set off beside the NYPD precinct? Is my roof on fire? Quick! I need to grab all my Lana … Continue reading
“Just another day at the office.” This is the defeated phrase sighed several times by blowhard hack…I mean, former National Security Advisor John Bolton in his recently published, not-quite-bombshell book The Room Where It Happened. Treading water in the eye of the shitstorm of daily impeachable offenses, hourly obstruction of justice, minute-by-minute clownish ridiculousness, and … Continue reading
Why hello there, dearest Filthy Dreams voters! As you probably noticed, the Democratic primaries are really heating up after last week’s Super Tuesday as Amy Klobuchar and Pete Buttigieg dropped out to rally around walking dentistry ad Quid Pro Joe, Bernie’s Twitter army tried to out-radical voters into supporting their candidate by howling about privilege, … Continue reading
Dearest faithful Filthy Dreams readers, We need your input. Last night, at the height of the Super Tuesday madness, but before the anti-dairy protesters (Turns out the revolution that was coming was about cheese!), the Trump campaign sent out an email to its cult followers…I mean, supporters(!). After references to the LAMESTREAM MEDIA in a … Continue reading
Was there any way to survive this past week and not be convinced that the world is ending? From the dud of a Democratic debate and the realization that a diverse field of candidates has been narrowed down to two elderly white guys to the potential for a widespread coronavirus pandemic and the deft choice … Continue reading
2020’s Democratic presidential primary has boiled down to one vital question. No, not what candidate you’re going to vote for. No, not who is most likely to beat our next best daytime TV talk show host president. No, not whose policies would be the best direction for our country, especially since whoever wins will inherit … Continue reading
Donald Trump isn’t a reality television show president. Or I guess I should say, he isn’t only a reality show president. Reality television is an unforgettable part of his rise, climbing to power through Apprentice boardroom meetings with weathered has-beens like Vince Neil, Gary Busey and Meatloaf, not to mention tacky tchotchkes and branded opportunities … Continue reading
Ugh! We have had it all the way up to our chinny-chin-chin with Trumpy Bear’s capitalization of what once belonged to us: SLEAZE! First there was the whole pussy grabbing–or was it pussy ass bitch–thing. Then, Stormy. Melania’s outfits. Don Jr.’s beard. Kavanaugh’s boozy meltdown. Jerry Falwell Jr.’s pictures. Religious leaders laying hands on Trump’s … Continue reading
“I was one thing, now I’m being another,” sings Our Lady of the Beaches, Driving Fast and Ruined Peaches Lana Del Rey in the song “Happiness is a butterfly,” off of her new blessed album Norman Fucking Rockwell!. And indeed, Lana is being another. Though certainly not a complete transition away from the rest of … Continue reading